Members Only Content
I wanted this. The diploma. The ending. The next step. For years, graduation felt like the goal I was working toward, the moment everything would finally make sense. I thought it would feel like relief, like proof that all the stress and late nights were worth it.
Instead, it feels like standing on the edge of something I’m not ready to name. The closer graduation gets, the heavier the questions feel. What’s next? Where are you going? What do you want to do? I give half-answers that sound confident enough, even when I don’t believe them myself.
I thought clarity would come with completion. That once I crossed this finish line, I’d feel certain about who I am and where I’m headed. But uncertainty followed me here too. The plans I made don’t feel as solid anymore, and the future feels bigger than I expected.
Some days I feel excited. Proud. Ready to move forward. Other days, I’m terrified of losing the structure college gave me. Of having no syllabus, no deadlines, no clear measure of success. Admitting that fear feels like failing at something I worked so hard for.
I’m learning that it’s okay to be unfinished at the start of something new. That fear doesn’t cancel out excitement. That not having everything figured out doesn’t mean I didn’t earn this moment. I asked for this ending — and maybe it’s okay that I’m still becoming as I step into what comes next.
